And now for the weather…

“…. ‘and take the bastard with you’ was reportedly his last words during the requiem mass. And now over to Tim for the weather….Tim, will I need a jumper today….?”

“….thank you Samantha…and no, I don’t think you’ll need that cable knit sweater today…in fact I don’t think you’ll need much clothing at all because as you can see it’s going to be….yes, I can see you’ve got there before me….it’s going be a bit on the warm side today. If I were you I’d wear as little as possible in the office and let the air refresh all your otherwise hard to reach places…you’d be best off in those little silk panties…yes just those panties…lovely….yes….you’ll be plenty warm enough…as this high pressure dominates the coast…, the cities…and…yes those little white silk panties I think would just be enough….”

(Studio director: “…cut to Samantha….Tim, are you ok?”) 

“…Thank you Tim, thank you, I think we get the message…….ahem…..and finally…Waitrose was fined £100 today for displaying a cucumber that looked exactly like a willy. “Imagine my shock, I’ve never seen such as like for years” said Mrs Trelllis of North Wales… “and believe me, I’ve looked often enough”.

Published by Lance Goodman

Freelance writer, bon vivant and all-round good oeuf.

2 thoughts on “And now for the weather…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: